Change is hard for me, even good change. In June, when
Carl’s school year ends, and he’s around more, I love it, but the transition is
still hard. Now, after a lovely summer, Carl is back to work, Daniel is back to
the babysitter, and I’m back to managing more of the household. Going into the
week I worried. How would Daniel adjust, after hanging out with Daddy all
summer? How would Carl adjust to work life again? What about our poor puggy,
home alone so much more?
To maximize peace in our home, and within myself, I decided
to try giving everyone extra leeway for the week. Rather than reprimand myself
for failing to write enough, I praised myself for writing at all. Rather than
battle with Daniel about his nap, I surrendered, played with him, took him to Target.
Rather than chastise Carl for coming home late, I invited a friend over for a
play date. In all cases, life was much more enjoyable. I even forgave the
asshole who cut me off in traffic yesterday. Yes, I felt the flood of righteous
anger, but I remembered leeway, and had some compassion for his hurry.
This week, with all its changes, was so peaceful that I’m
wondering if leeway should be a permanent mantra. Maybe I’m always harder on
people, including myself, than is necessary or helpful. Maybe I’d be happier
with lower expectations and greater acceptance of shortcomings. Hm. Maybe I’ll extend
it another week and see how it goes.
Where do you fall on the leeway scale? Do you give too
little or too much?
3 comments:
Leeway with myself is one of the gifts I am discovering in this temporary retirement between jobs. With extra time, I can let up and not try to get it all done in one day. Now if I can just hold onto what I am learning when I go back to work 3 days a week carol
Leeway. I like it. Am adopting it immediately. I must practice something like that. Maybe it's called, "we're all doing the best we can." I like Leeway. It's far more economical, and seeing it described in a different way helps me integrate it deeper into my irritable cells. Lovely. very very lovely!
Leeway. Love it. I have various mantras."Annnnd we're breathing" is a favourite.
But my cutest, favourite-est is from my 7yr old daughter. A few years back while adults & bigger sisters et al were having a kinda tense discussion a little voice pipes up
"Guys, guys. Chill."
That'll do it every time.
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