Friday, July 4, 2008

Showing Up

I feel proud of myself this week for showing up for my life. To me, showing up means living in the moment, seizing opportunities as they arise, using my talents, remembering my values and priorities and making choices based on them. How to show up differs day to day and moment to moment.

This week, showing up meant capitalizing on a few precious days to work at home before we leave town for another two weeks. It meant pulling out and piecing together the thoughts my subconscious had worked out about the book while I was taking a break last week. It meant looking at the overall structure of the novel, and using my new understanding of my protagonist to make sure her behavior is consistent with her personality. It meant using my enthusiasm for editing while it lasts.

It also meant physically showing up in Ocean City to see my grandmom. It meant ignoring my internal critic screaming that I’d never finish the book (he’s such a drama queen), having pizza with my clan, riding the ferris wheel, stealing a few minutes alone with Grandmom, passing an hour sitting on the porch.

On Wednesday, showing up meant ditching my work for a few hours to surf while the surfing was good. It meant staying in the ocean, in spite of getting smacked in the face with a wall of seawater by the first wave I tried to catch. It meant paddling out again and again in spite of my bruised pride (and body) that wanted to give up. It meant staying aware and open so I could learn the lessons that came, see my growing comfort on the board, feel my growing understanding of the ocean.

The amazing thing about showing up is how much more joy I feel, and how much less worry. Concentrating on whatever I’m doing or feeling in the moment blocks out obsessing about past or future. None of us knows how many more days we have but we do know that we will never have this day, today, again. So shouldn’t we all try to show up for whatever days we have?

Thank you to everyone who read the review of my blog on Philadelphia Stories and posted comments, and the many kind emails and postings you’ve been sending me recently. Your support is a huge reason why I’m able to show up!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do you think you could "show up" in California? It was great seeing Carl but I missed you. And...of course Sophia missed you. Carl said that she first looked at him with this look like, "Ok, you're here, but where's Julie?" I've been catching up on the blog and just love it! Congrats on the rave reviews in the Philly article too!
:) Sophia's mommy

Historical Geek said...

Just showing up - I think it was Woody Allen who said 80% of success is just showing up. Thank you for bringing such a positive spin to this idea. I have used the idea of just showing up to drag myself out of bed and do things I often times don't feel like doing. I've told myself to just show up when I felt insecure about not being prepared for lesson, an event, a class, whatever. I used to think "just showing up" was a slacker's mantra, but now I realize it can be the icing on the cake of everyday life. Thank you Julie for helping me to understand that I can celebrate everyday if I focus on the delicious sugar sweetness that is present in each moment. :)

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